Hard to Wait!

It's been over 3 years since I last wrote in this blog.  It's not that not because the lack of activity in my life.  I've been focusing my writing to short stories.  My friends in my writer's group I've been in since October of 2015, have encouraged me to do so.  

However, after a new online friend reminded me of blogs, I decided it was time to get back to writing here on a more regular basis. It's been a very stressful few months.  It's been one crisis after another.  I've been trying to see God's hand in things.  It's been hard to ignore, but it's still hard to be honest!!!

I'll back up what I realized today is nearly six months ago.  I was in the midst of a very stressful overwhelming time at the job I absolutely loved, yet signs showed that it was time to consider leaving.  I didn't have the heart to leave the residents I had come to love serving them meals for the past six years.  I worked at the independent senior community as a dining room server.

As hurtful as it was being terminated very unexpectedly, it was a relief.  I was worn mentally and physically. God knew my need to be free from that.  Besides He also knew my future of surgeries and other health issues.

I had carpal tunnel release surgery in November.  When I recovered from that nicely by the way, I pursued getting my long growing large lipoma taken care of that my observant new Nurse Practitioner advised me to have removed. That recovery from the January surgery proved to be smooth also.

Right after that, I started to have a flare up of my longtime mostly dormant stomach condition called Gastroparesis.  I blame it on emotional eating from depression and lack of exercise. It got to the point my stomach had enough.  Thankfully I had a checkup already scheduled with my gastroenterologist.  He took me off of my longtime medicine that thankfully hadn't caused side effects. He thought it best not to risk it anymore.  There is a new medicine he wants me on, but insurance doesn't cover it.  So far, the past month without anything but diet restrictions, I've been doing pretty well without it.  I see the doctor tomorrow for a follow up .

It's been honestly stressful not feeling well, but the newest crisis that our family is going through right now has caused me the most worry and fret.

As I've described in this blog, my sweet daughter, Anna has had Mitral Valve Stenosis for all of her life.  According to her latest echocardiogram done in December, that is still doing very well.  At her follow up visit to the cardiologist, she informed us that there is a major change in her EKG that has never shown up before.  She ordered a redo of the test in 3 weeks (which was last week).

In the meantime, about 2 weeks ago, Anna started to show some new symptoms, dizziness, shortness of breath and chest tightness.

When I called the cardiologist's office, I was told to contact her primary doctor.  It didn't make sense to me given her symptoms, but thankfully her primary doctor got the message and had me take Anna to the Emergency Room.  There, their EKG showed the same abnormality that the doctor's office one did, plus she had a high heart rate.  The Physicians Assistant was concerned enough to call a cardiologist who got a hold of Anna's latest echo and ekg.  We were instructed to follow up with a cardiologist.  Tim made an appointment with a cardiologist within the medical group that her primary doctor is part of.  It ended up being a great idea.  Her longtime pediatric cardiologist (about 4 years at least after her amazing cardiologist since literally day 1 of her life retired) She ignored the symptoms and the evidence.  She blamed it on anxiety and dehydration!  She had always had a high expectation of how much she should drink everyday,and yeah, what person would not be anxious not being able to breathe correctly?

Thankfully her wonderful primary doctor has been taking this situation seriously.  She has ordered a halter heart monitor that Anna is getting on Monday.  She sees the new cardiologist on Thursday the 6th.  Please pray this new cardiologist will recognize the problem and help her.  

Philippians 4:6 comes to mind as it has in other stressful situations.  "Be anxious for nothing!!!"  It says.

It's hard not to be worried seeing a normally active happy girl in fear of aggrivating her heart rate or breathing.  

I know God has a plan for Anna and will show that soon.  It's just so hard to wait!